034Motorsport Tulip Glass
Is your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife giving off that "not so hot" feeling these days? Has time taken its toll on their good looks? Wrinkles, weight gain, the aging process, grey or receding hair all can make us feel like ending it and having a fling with a younger floozie...
But here at 034Motorsport, we believe that when you make the commitment in a comitted relationship, you should stick to it, and there is no better way than with the new 034Motorsport Beer Glass.
Here's how it works, depending on your level of satisfaction with your partner:
Level 1 - "Hmm, she used to be hotter, but we've been through so much together and I love her deeply, I could never see myself with another person" - Fill the 034Motorsport beer glass with your favorite beer 3 times every 4-6 hours you are around your partner, chill the glass first for a refreshing mouth feel!
Level 2 - "Honestly, he used to be in great shape, thin with a full head of hair, now he looks like Danny Devito (at any point in his career), I'm thinking about having an affair but want to try to save it?" - Fill the 034Motorsport beer glass with your favorite wine such as Merlot, Carlo Rossi or $2 chuck. Drink 3 glasses every 6 hours until your partner looks less like Danny Devito and more like, say Balki Bartokomous from Perfect Strangers.
Level 3 - "I've tried, I mean, I've tried, but the "old lady" really does look like an old lady! I'm disgusted!!" - Fill your 034Motorsport glass with your favorite hard liquor like Jack Daniels, Everclear or home made potato moonshine. Drink 3 glasses every 4-6 hours untill unconcious, when you come to, if you are still disgusted by your partner, have another glass and repeat until satisfied.
There you have it, simple, effective ways to relationship bliss with the 034Motorsport Beer Glass!
- ZTF-01 Coaster Set$22.00
- 034Motorsport Koozie$5.00
- Lanyard, 034Motorsport$7.00
- Sunglasses, 034Motorsport$13.00
- Hat, 034Motorsport Flexfit$38.00
Warning: This product may contain a chemical known to the State of California to cause cancer, birth defects, or other reproductive harm.
Learn More: www.p65warnings.ca.gov